Press 1 if you have lost the will to hold any longer

I am sick of automated answering services, all I would like to do is speak to someone. Whoever invented these systems should be taken out and shot at dawn. I am also fed up with the not so subliminal advertising that you have to listen to while Brenda on the Gold Coast chews her gum and bothers her arse to take my call. At the moment, I am being told that the Post Offices sells postcards, birthday cards and a great range of birthday presents, like printers. Now, if my much beloved brought me a printer for my birthday, I am liable to throw it at him.

My modem has been returned to sender because they couldn’t find our address, so now I am being advertised all the goodies that Big Pond have to offer me, which isn’t very nice as I HAVEN’T GOT A MODEM TO ACCESS ANY OF IT!! They also have really bad hold music too.

God I sound like a right grumpy bum today, but I have spent 4 days sitting in the flat while it has been really nice and sunny outside waiting for people to either connect the phone line, or the modem to be delivered. It is really frustrating, I know I don’t have a job at the moment, which is probably just as well as I would have had to have taken time off to be here, but it’s so maddening that I could have gone out after all as they didn’t arrive.

We had a great weekend, we watched the Grand Final at Lachy’s, I fell asleep in the middle of the most exciting quarter, I couldn’t help it I was comfy on the couch and just drifted off. Matty’s friend Melanie was lovely, they have known each other 20 years, he was best man at her wedding – so that’s one of the four he’s been at where it has now ended in divorce. Us four then went out for dinner in Carnegie, back to the Rosstown hotel where I had liver and bacon again (yum). We chatted for ages, then Matt drove Mel home, and meandered back to his Mum’s house to go home to Berrigan in the morning.

On Sunday Dan and I went into the City, we were going to go to the Art Deco exhibition at the gallery, but the queue was enormous, (it closes this weekend) so we had a cup of tea in the new tea room, looked at the map and wandered around. The one room Dan wanted to see wasn’t what he thought, ‘In the shadow of the moon’ was a Chinese painter not the moon, and the exhibit I wanted to see ‘Burial rites and clothing’ was closed. So it didn’t go as planned, but we had a good time, they have lovely paintings, a couple of Constable’s, Turner’s, Joseph Wright of Derby, a lovely Rothko and some glorious silver ware tea caddys. We spent a couple of hours mooching round, decided that we were getting hungry so wandered over the river to see if we could find something to eat. We ended up in a cafe that ran down the side of the old Post Office in Melbourne, literally in an alley that some bright spark realised it’s potential space. We sat next to a yummy mummy, her yummy hubby and their two revolting children ‘Tess don’t do that, it’s not nice‘ why do we end up with them? They were talking to their friends another couple who are evidently revving up for the wedding of the year, yummy mummy is ‘SOO much more nervous about your wedding than I was about mine’. Dan and I tried not to laugh, but they were so loud it made us trying to have a conversation difficult. But as he said, it has given me something to blog about for you all.

We then went on the hunt for a Molton Brown plunger for his shower gel. Not something you would have thought would be that difficult to find, but we tried two department stores before we found MB, then they didn’t have any pumps so the lady lost out on a $40 sale of shower gel. Anyone who knows MB will know you cannot pour it out the bottle without wasting it, so you need the pump to avoid wasting all that lovely MB deliciousness. Can I ask that one of you tries to find a pump for us and send it out please? There are some in the toilets of the Arts Centre, but I am not going to liberate one, the loos are always to busy to get away with it…!

I had a bit of a down day yesterday, hormonal, not because I am missing you all, that goes without saying, it was (in a whisper) the wrong time of the month, and being stuck inside waiting for a postman that didn’t knock once, let alone twice, meant I couldn’t get out and walk it off. I will when, if, I ever get off the phone to Big Pond be going out for a walk today though. I also have the car, so will be going back to the not so local, local library. If you missed that blog, it is over an hours walk away, so while it is a lovely library, I am usually puffed out when I get there, a bit hot and sweaty so not conducive to browsing. If I drive it takes 10 minutes, and I am in a much better frame of mind to peruse the bookshelves. It’s where I got the unintentionally funny wedding book from, with useful tips on keeping the bridegroom interested in the process of planning ‘your’ day. No wonder so many marriages fail. Mine didn’t for that reason, it failed coz he sh****d a friend of mine.

Anyhoo, when I get off this phone call, I can 1) have a wee, I have had a pot of tea this morning *crosses eyes in concentration*, 2) have a shower, 3) get out the house, oooh the options are endless.

They have to cancel the original order, and send me out a new modem. When the hell that one will arrive I have no idea. In this day and age of technology and customer service, I never thought it would be this bad. Sara, you need to get over here and sort them out, you were in Singapore last week, flying by to rattle Telstra and Big Pond would have only taken you a couple of days!

I am going to close now, before I bang my head on my keyboard with frustration and blog like: ldfkkjlfdsjfjoggha

One thought on “Press 1 if you have lost the will to hold any longer

  1. I can only sympathise at how shite customer service is, only from my experience with BT & Tiscali. I now need to contact BT but the thought 1) pains me, 2) makes me mad before I have even started!!Sounds like you have a really exciting day ahead!


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